Is there a typical 'swinger'?

Do 'swingers' fit into a typical pigeon hole? Fair enough, we've all managed to squeeze into a few tight holes in our past, but what I mean is, can you put us all into a typical box and label us as 'a swinger'?

Go to a comic convention, or a village country fair, and visitors all tend to have something in common. It might be the mannerisms, or the clothing, the type of car, or the language they use... but there is a definite 'theme' behind these different cultures. However, I don't think I've noticed the same thing for swingers.

We could be gay, straight or try-sexual (yes, we'll all try anything once). There might be similarities between groups of swingers...let's have a look at a few...

1. The 'average' couple - possibly with a few kids, a semi in the suburbs and a decent family car. They smile in the knowledge that their dull neighbours have absolutely no idea what they are doing, that their naughty weekends add a special something to life. They are the nicest of people, warm, welcoming and absolutely filthy. We love them. They leave our company, glowing in the knowledge that their secret is safe with us. Until they meet those dull neighbours during the next swingers night-out...

2. The Quiet Man - known to everyone by a pseudonym, usually 'Dave', the Quiet Man may be divorced..and is all the richer for it. He likes to watch, he occasionally comments in club reviews or forums, but most of the time he is living the life of Riley. After all, what else does a man need apart from good company and a horde of friendly ladies?

3. The Show-Off - you can spot them a mile off, usually wearing the most elaborate costume at Fancy Dress parties. They are the life and soul of the party, and swingers nights would be a lot quieter without them. However, by the time the action starts to happen they are usually too drunk to participate much, but at least they got the party started.

4. The jealous partner - opps, looks like you've joined the wrong community. There is no point in calling yourself a swinger if one or both partners in a relationship start bickering the moment someone is invited in. It's not nice, it's not needed, save the domestics for home and come back when you're ready...unless all that shouting and arguing is what gets you off, after all the rest of us don't know what you get up to at home.

5. The experienced lady. Yes, she's been around the block a few times, more than a few in fact and taken a few wrong turns and dead ends, but boy, does she know what she's doing. She may complain in private that she feels her looks are fading, that she's put on weight and her nipples are heading south, but you and I know that she can make a night spectacular. To all those experienced ladies out there, we salute you.

6. The BDSM Master/Mistress - they know so much! Every chat with them they'll introduce you to some new amazing form of sexual torture using some kitchen utensil or similar. They really are dedicated to their craft. If they invite you to join, jump at the chance, word of warning though, be clear on your own boundaries(and theirs) before you start, otherwise you never know where that egg-whisk will end up.

There are many, many more familiar types you'll be aware of the next time your meeting-up with a couple or a group of people, tell us about it in the forum. I guess one of the main points that connects us all is just pure enjoyment of sex, we can fit in in those comic conventions or country fairs, and you wouldn't know unless you saw the twinkle in our eyes.

Now, I wonder which type am I....

Featured Posts
Recent Posts